As I started college at University of Wisconsin-Sheboygan, coming from a home-schooled background, I didn't know what to expect, but what I found definitely wasn't what I expected. That sentence didn't really make sense, did it? Well, I had a few preconceived ideas about what it might be like. I think I phantasized college as the solution to all my problems, the addition of friends, an awesome social life, and the entry-way into the reality of a career for my future life. It wasn't that. In some respects it did solve some problems, however the other questions almost became more problematic than the previous ones.
I struggled with why I was here, what I wanted to really do with my life. I never did find the major that I wanted to direct my studies toward. In fact, my field of vision might have even been decreased through the experience. The classes I took [or the classes that I am actually completing in my first-semester-college-experience] have changed my life. I enjoyed learning and I'm thankful for the knowledge that I'm taking away from them. However, from my point of view, being a Born-again Christian, and having the strong beliefs I have, it's more important to live for Christ, to have Him be my focus, not to worry about where I'm at in life, and the decisions that need to be made. If I'm living for my Savior then everything else will fall into place. If I'm living for my Lord then He will make my life successful no matter where He has placed me in life or whatever situations I'm going through.
It's interesting how God uses things in your life to encourage you later on. About a year ago my cousin gave me a burned CD of a random collection of songs, it included some goofy fun songs, some Owl City, random pop music, and, inserted aimlessly in the middle, a Christian song about how Christians should live for Christ without worrying about the stresses of this world. Put in perspective, living for my Lord is the most important thing, everything else comes later.
After listening to this song...over and over and over....I realized how I've been frustrated, stressing, and getting angry over how my life is going right now. How nothing seems to be working out for me, how I can't seem to make anything work out, but is my real focus on making my God look down on me and be happy with how I'm relying on His love for me, trusting His perfect, complete plan for my life, and leaving everything up to Him? If I do those, then He will make everything fall into place, He'll give me satisfaction even in the smallest areas of life, and give me peace in the struggles I face. His love will make those tough situations I experience bearable. He makes me strong enough and encourages me to endure the trials, set-backs, difficulties, and pressures of this world and live an even more complete life through His will.
The decision to quit school was definitely a hard one. I struggled, and am still struggling, in the area of "is this really where God wants me to be? How do I know that my decision was the right choice? Where do I go next and how do I get there?" Through a couple of different peoples' impact on my life, (my friends, family, and mom/parents) I've come to realize that if I'm striving to be who the Lord wants me to be then He'll impact every area of my life and answer the questions I have.
To those of you who know where I'm coming from on this, I hope you are encouraged by the song and take it to heart like I have. To you who don't understand the wonderful love of a Savior who died for you, then I encourage you to pick up a Bible and read the New Testament. You're life can be changed forever.
It sounds like you learned QUITE a bit this semester. Glory to God. I think it was good you tried college out. You may go back but you've learned that for right now, it's just not right. Your relationship with the Lord Jesus has grown and if you never go back to college... that's fine, you'll live... but GOD is more #1 now than ever and I am thankful for that in you. :) Praying for you kidlet. You are making a huge impact in my kid's lives and that is another thing that glorifies the Lord. Being a godly example to the little people who adore you. :)
ReplyDelete"The decision to quIt school" (you made a typo on quit) Sorry... I hate it when I blog and then find typos so I thought I'd share with you.
Great post, Kj, it's good to hear your thoughts and perspective. =)
ReplyDeleteIt was a challenge to me, too.
Love you.
Kjest, I think you learned more in one semester then some people learn in 4 years of college.
ReplyDeleteTake from someone who dropped out of college after 4 weeks, you can always go back.
Keep your priorities straight, Jesus then everything else.
I think you're doing just fine.
You never answered your own question, did you do your best?
ReplyDelete"Is this really where God wants me to be?"
ReplyDeleteI hope it is an encouragement to tell you that I believe the Bible tells you everything you need to know about where God wants you to be. It is the rare believer to whom He says "I want you to go here and do this thing." Paul is the classic example of this. But consider the majority of the disciples to whom He gave much more general direction, "Go into all the world and preach the gospel to all nations," etc. If you follow His Word, and strive for Christ with your life, you can't go wrong. We must trust that if He wants us doing something more specific, He'll let us know! :)
Thanks Aaron. I think you're right. What I'm doing here and now, for God, is what really matters.
ReplyDelete